Jerry: “Oh no you don’t! Osgood, I’m gonna level with you. We can’t get married at all.”
Osgood: “Why not?”
Jerry: “Well, in the first place, I’m not a natural blonde.”
Osgood: “Doesn’t matter.”
Jerry: “I smoke! I smoke all the time!”
Osgood: “I don’t care.”
Jerry: “Well, I have a terrible past. For three years now, I’ve been living with a saxophone player.”
Osgood: “I forgive you.”
Jerry: [tragically] “I can never have children!”
Osgood: “We can adopt some.”
Jerry: “But you don’t understand, Osgood! Ohh…”
[Jerry finally gives up and pulls off his wig]
Jerry: [normal voice] “I’m a man!”
Osgood: [shrugs] “Well, nobody’s perfect!”
Confessions From A Geek Mind 
I’ve never seen this movie but I’ve always wanted to, simply for this line. I laugh every time!
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It’s a great movie! It’s one of my favourite comedy films ever.
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The Johnny Cab from Total Recall (1990) always reminds me of Osgood! Some Like it Hot is brilliant though, Monroe is excellent.
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OMG that is so true! He does look like Johnny Cab! Good spot.
Totally agree about it being a brilliant film. Better than most comedies that you see at the cinema.
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